Looking Okay

My friend was overwhelmed by a tragedy in his life some time ago. He looks good; you know, like he is coping well and learning to adjust to living in the wake of his heartbreak. So much so, I had kind of moved on from his pain. I stopped asking “How are you doing?”

I assumed things were better and he was, like me, moving beyond the sorrow.

I was wrong.

We had a chance to sit and talk the other day and for the first time in a long time I asked, “How are you doing?”

And I got an honest answer.

“It’s easier to look okay than to be okay. And if you look okay it sometimes keeps people from asking if you are okay.”

While I am still processing this conversation, God has already taught me a lot through this exchange. He rebuked me for my selfishness in so quickly moving beyond someone else’s pain. He reminded me how important living in community is. He demonstrated to me the lengths to which all of us will go to protect ourselves. And He taught me once again the danger of slipping into surface relationships.

Psalm 20:1-5
In times of trouble, may the Lord respond to your cry.
May the God of Israel keep you safe from all harm.
2May he send you help from his sanctuary
and strengthen you from Jerusalem.
3May he remember all your gifts
and look favorably on your burnt offerings.


4May he grant your heart’s desire
and fulfill all your plans.
5May we shout for joy when we hear of your victory,
flying banners to honor our God.
May the Lord answer all your prayers.

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